Dear Friends and Family,
Each month, our community here in Galati focuses on one of Word Made Flesh's nine lifestyle celebrations: intimacy, obedience, humility, community, service, simplicity, submission, brokenness and suffering. Our focus during February was on the celebration of service, and I was asked to share some of my thoughts during one of our morning chapel meetings.
Before sharing, I began thinking more deeply about the real purpose behind our service. I have heard at different times in my life that the purpose of service is to show people God's love and, through this, for them to come to know Him personally. At other times in my life I have heard that the goal of service is to bring about social justice-that our building of schools and wells and homes and our distribution of food and clothing might somehow contribute to the eradication of poverty. While both of these views hold some truth, I think, they ultimately both fail to penetrate what I see as the heart of service.
The past month has been unusually hard for me in my service among the small group of children I spend time with daily. One of them began having a conflict with some of the other children who come to the center. So, naturally, he stopped coming. We made a home visit. We talked to the other children involved. No use. He hasn't been back to the center in a month. Another child had a conflict with his teacher and quite obstinately made a decision to no longer come to the center. We made a home visit. We had a meeting with the teacher. No use. He also hasn't been to the center in a month.
Feelings ranging from helplessness to despair have accompanied me this month as I think about all of the time invested in these two kids since I came on staff in May. I think about one who couldn't recognize more than 10 letters of the alphabet but who is now reading entire sentences. I think about the other who didn't know any letters but who recently begged me to let him take a book home to read on his own. I think about sullen visages now brightened by smiles and laughter. I think about the prayers shared by children learning that they are loved and created in the image of God. But now? Does any of this matter?
These feelings of failure and my shock at the emptiness left behind by these two children began to mix their way into my musings on service. What happens if, after months of service, no one finds new life through relationship with God? What happens if, after months of service, poverty is just as prevalent as ever? What is the point?
While mulling these questions over in my mind one day, I happened to begin flipping through a book I had read before my internship with Word Made Flesh in 2007, and, gently, I began to hear God speak to me: “[S]ervice is an expression of the search for God and not just of the desire to bring about individual or social change….As long as the help we offer to others is motivated primarily by the changes we may accomplish, our service cannot last long. When results do not appear, when success is absent, when we are no longer liked or praised for what we do, we lose the strength and motivation to continue. When we see nothing but sad, poor, sick, or miserable people who, even after our many attempts to offer help, remain sad, poor, sick, and miserable, then the only reasonable response is to move away in order to prevent ourselves from becoming cynical or depressed. Radical servanthood challenges us, while attempting persistently to overcome poverty, hunger, illness, and any other form of human misery, to reveal the gentle presence of our compassionate God in the midst of our broken world” (Henri Nouwen, Compassion, p. 29-30).
Thus, I was once again reminded that I am serving Jesus among the poorest of the poor. I am not here to change anyone or anything. Change happens, and we praise God for it, but I am here ultimately to find and know the presence of Jesus among the most vulnerable. In times of frustration and discouragement, when the investments I've made seem worthless, it is the unveiling of His constant and loving presence that somehow compels me. And it is in this place of love revealed that I am drawn more deeply into intimacy with Him, the intimacy from which I derive the strength to press on one more day in service.
“I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things…” (Philippians 3:8, NIV).
May your gaze be fixed on Him today.
Grace and peace,
John Koon | OP6 CP256; Galati, 800.760; Romania | 614.364.4098 | john.koon@wordmadeflesh.com
PRAYER REQUESTS:
1) Please be in prayer for the two students who are no longer coming to the Valley House. Pray that we might have wisdom in knowing how to best approach each situation and that God's Spirit would move, bringing hope and healing to everyone involved.
2) Pray for I., an 8-year-old second grader who has recently started coming to our community center and who is participating in my group. He is bright-eyed and full of curiosity and wonder. Pray that his mind would be open to learning and that God would speak words of love and hope over him each day.
3) Continue to pray for our team as we plan for and dream about WMF Moldova. Our next big step will be a short trip with the servant team to Chişinău, the capital city, for two weeks at the end of March. Pray specifically regarding the logistics of planting a new field as we have much to do and to learn.
4) Pray for the new servant team of six that will be with us in Galati from February to June. Ask God to open their minds to all that they will be learning as they serve here with us.
5) Pray for the Klepac family as they return to the States in March. Ask that their transition out of life in Romania would go smoothly and that we as a community would all be able to say goodbye in a healthy way.
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